Oh No They Didn't!: Godeth Continues to Serve The Less Fortunate by Setting Sad, Lonely, Little, Latina Girl Up on Dates

Oh No They Didn't!
Oh No They Didn't! - LiveJournal.com
Godeth Continues to Serve The Less Fortunate by Setting Sad, Lonely, Little, Latina Girl Up on Dates
Oct 26th 2011, 20:41



Gwyneth Paltrow is turning matchmaker for Cameron Diaz!

The Iron Man beauty has promised Cameron to help her settle in once she moves to the UK and that includes finding suitable dates.

Cameron loves London and really wants to get settled quickly, says a source close to the actress.

She already has friends there but she wants to meet new people. Gwyneth has already introduced her to certain friends of hers and that includes at least two single guys who would seem to be ideal for her.

The 38-year-old actress who recently split from baseball star Alex Rodriguez - plans to divide her time between the US and the property in Belsize Park, which is located in the north of the UK capital, and has already surprised her neighbors with her down-to-earth attitude.

Cameron has been out and about a few
times since moving in,a source said.

She's been going to Starbucks a fair bit to get coffee. She's been walking down the road without a care in the world while blokes have been literally falling over themselves as she strides past. It's so funny to watch.

Your husband's a big cricket fan, isn't he. Do you understand it? One day, I was determined to sit down and get into it. So I was watching and watching, and I said to Chris, "Is anything going to happen?" And he says, "Is anything going to happen? These are the highlights!" Do you look in the mirror and think you are beautiful? Not that often. Sometimes.

Where do you stand on plastic surgery? I'm not opposed to it. I think people should do whatever makes them feel good. But I think there's a line not to cross. What is your next project? Well, in the fall I'm going to do this little independent movie in New York City for a couple of weeks. It's very funny. It's called Thanks For Sharing and is about recovering sex addicts. Then I have Iron Man 3.?

SOURCE

I continue to be ever so inspired by America's princess, Lady Gwyneth of Williamsburg. This Cameroon girl is so very blessed to have her in her miserable, little life. Without her, she would undoubtedly die alone like an obese ONTDer or a gay person on their death bed whose partner isn't allowed access to the hospital room. I remember when I tried to set up my own sad, lonely, little Latina girl, my housemaid Guadalupe. Although she told me time and time again she was happily married to the love of her life, I simply would not hear of it. I mean, who would marry a maid? They are so...poor. Anyway,there was this lovely chap who did the taxes for my husband's charity water polo team who was fresh out of a relationship with one of those insufferable Mortimer girls and looking for a bit of no strings attached fun. I offered him unlimited access to Guadalupe's quarters in return for covering up the smallest discrepancy in our company's pension fund and he agreed! I was so very proud of my matchmaking skills! Unfortunately, my miracle child Hortensia, the one with the hunchback and lazy eye, escaped from her padlocked cell room that evening and mauled that poor man to death. Luckily, I knew I could call on my good friend Gwyneth to help me with the body. With the help of culinary wunderkind Mario Batali we made the most lovely human and fennel stew topped with whole wheat croutons and grated Parmesano Reggiano cheese. Mmmm, manja!

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